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- EXCUSE ME PLEASE Katmai National Park and Preserve has crowned a winner in its annual Fat Bear Contest: Holly, who "did not stop fishing" for an entire month, "except to dig a belly hole big enough for her to sleep in." Your regular reminder that perseverance pays off.
- President Donald Trump demands an apology from the whistleblower and "others" — presumably, those who described his telephone etiquette on that call with Ukraine as "crazy" and "frightening" — for this whole impeachment thing.
- Relatedly, happy Wirch Hunt Wednesday, my head hurts.
- Football spouse Coleen Rooney set an Instagram trap to figure out which of her followers had been selling her private information to British tabloids, and fellow football spouse Rebekah Vardy apparently wandered right in. For her part, Vardy can't believe Rooney would smear her like this, "especially when [she, Vardy, is] heavily pregnant." Hmm yes sure, but also, WHO?????
- Kim Kardashian thinks teen climate activist Greta Thunberg is "amazing" and wants to help her with social media strategy.
- Facebook's advertising algorithms have reportedly flagged hundreds of thousands of children as "interested" in gambling and alcohol, which… who knows what the kids are into these days.
- Pacific Gas and Electric is cutting power for as many as 800,000 California customers, over fear of wildfires in coming days.
- According to the CDC, 2018 charted record-high STI transmission rates.
- Imagine showing up unprepared to interview Rihanna for a Vogue cover story.
- And finally, here is a trick that is also a treat:
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